If you are having problems with your marriage because of covid, you are not alone, and there are places that you can turn to for help. It is possible to avoid covid divorce if you follow the survival guides and advice that is out there. We should think of covid as something which is only temporarily going to impact our lives, and that once free of it, we can resume normality and the environment that we once coped with.
Covid, the highly contagious disease that it is, results in us being brought closer together in our own bubble, in times of lockdown. We are asked not to leave our house unless it is considered necessary. For instance, to fetch food, medial supplies, or to help with care. Childcare, included. This all means that if your relationship with your spouse was already strained, this kind of prolonged closeness to each other can only make matters worse and, at times, unbearable. When you could previously just go out and clear the air, so to speak, now you are almost trapped as your own prisoner. So, you may find it helpful to talk it through, with either people you know or even complete strangers who will not judge you for any kind of perceived failure on your part. The fact is, it happens, people do fall out of love. The thing to know is whether there is some love left to rekindle or it is time to call it quits.
Family or Close Friends?
Sometimes it might seem like your best friend knows you better than your family. You may have lost touch with family and developed in an employment role that has changed you as a person. The person you first met might have had that happen to them, too. We were born with certain personality traits but many of them have been developed from what life has thrown at us and how we have dealt with it. This is not to discount family members if you think that they can help. They can be a good support network in a covid or any other crisis.
At a marriage guidance session, the counsellor will ask you to try and avoid reacting and to, instead, think and reflect. They will suggest that you share any thoughts and feeling that you have rather than keep them inside where they can only make you angrier and frustrated. A good marriage counsellor will have the skills to help you open up, so that you talk willingly and freely, something that is actually quite difficult, or will have been difficult. There will be things that you do not want to say directly to your partner that you can share in confidence with the marriage counsellor. It may help you to put everything into perspective and see if you are over-reacting to the situation. It may be that you are in the right, in which case you will know what needs to be done.
You could consider obtaining advice from a legal representative so that you would know what to do to protect your financial interests. You do not have to pursue any legal matters further, but it is sometimes good to know just what is at stake should your marriage break up. It can act as something of a deterrent, in fact. If your thoughts are born more out of malice or revenge than anything else then you may in the light of day see the repairs that can be made to your relationship before this happens, though.
For some further tips on staying married during a quarantine or lockdown, click here.