At the start of any relationship, arguments and disagreements are few and far between. But as those relationships develop roots and become more meaningful, quarrels and opposing views can start to show. Many couples work through these issues or simply brush these problems away, but over time certain disagreements continue to rise to the surface, with the most common conflicts always over the same issue: money. You might be wondering, why do couples fight over money so much?

Perhaps you have better money management skills than your partner, or maybe you’re a little too happy to spend while they’re adamant about saving for a rainy day. It’s clear that money is a hot issue between couples, so understanding the main reasons why people argue about it so much, can help you find common ground and make your relationship stronger.

Read on to find out more about why do couples fight over money. 

Saving issues

Saving for the future is something all couples should consider. But when one partner is taking this more seriously than the other, it can cause friction. When you’re not on the same page, resentment can set in, especially when the partner who is consistently saving is trying to plan for the future they’re planning to share.

Creating your own personal pension and making regular contributions to supplement your state and workplace pensions is good financial planning, though it’s not always easy to get your partner on your side. Sit down and discuss with them the benefits of planning for your retirement and your future together, considering all the things you can enjoy in your golden years if you open personal pensions and make regular contributions. Whatever happens, don’t put your own savings on hold, continue to add to your personal pension and you can enjoy a 25% tax relief top-up until you decide to cash in your pension.

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Spending habits

Is your partner overly frugal? Or are they always receiving deliveries and packages? Spending habits can quickly cause tension and friction between couples, especially if they have different views on spending, or if you’re trying to save. It’s important that couples experiencing this tension, communicate how they’re feeling. You might want to spend some of the money you’re working hard to earn, while your partner wants to put more money into the savings accounts. It’s important for each side of the argument to be heard and to find common ground. Sitting down together and working out a budget that keeps everyone content might be the best way forward.


Is your partner being financially unfaithful? Are they spending more than they say they are? Secrets are enough to shake even the most steadfast of relationships and keeping secrets about money and spending can leave some relationships unsalvageable. Whether they’re hiding money from you, trying to keep a lid on their mishandled finances or have debts that are spiralling out of control, secrets and finances are never a good combination. When it comes to money, it’s always best to be as clear and transparent as possible and this will help you understand why do couples fight over money. 

Final thoughts…

It’s clear that money will always bring some contention into a relationship, but as long as couples are on the same page and communicate their concerns well, money will become less of a confrontational issue.